What’s in a Name?
by Lovey Roundtree Oliff
When I was in 3rd grade, I remember my teacher, Mrs. Gaver, taking attendance and she called out my government name “Wameeka Roundtree.”
I shyly said, “Present.”
At home, my cousins, friends, parents, and play cousins all called me Lovey. It was my name. It’s what felt right. The people I trusted most knew me by that name. As the story goes, when my mother lived in Haiti she knew a girl named “Love” and swore that her first daughter would be named Lovey. I won the birth and name lottery! At the same time of my glorious arrival, my parents were living in Brooklyn and it was absolutely en vogue to give young Black children creative names that broke away from the stereotypical Anglo-American based names. There weren’t any Sarahs, Karens or Monicas in our groups. We had Unique, Asia, Monique, and Wameeka (I even knew a Wamecca — different pronunciation).
Long story short, I didn’t love the name and I didn’t feel like it suited me. My parents were strict…very strict. There was little in my life I controlled but when I told them I wanted to legally change my name, they said “Ok.”
Just like that…my mom put in the paperwork and thank goodness it only cost about $30 at the time because I assume had it been more, they would’ve frugally said no.
By the time I entered 6th grade, the paperwork was finalized and I had to tell all my friends that they had to start calling me Lovey and without hesitation they did. I finally felt like me. 100% whole. So this episode was important because I own my name and my identity and when people try to distort it or take that away from me, it angers me beyond belief. You don’t get to call me whatever you feel like. You don’t get to constantly mock my name. You don’t get to butcher my name. You get to call me Lovey and if you can’t do that, then you can’t get to me. Period.
P.S. Back in the day to legally change your name, someone in the basement office literally drew a line through the old name and rewrote the new one on top!
